One Touch Read online

  At that moment, seeing the hurt and the pain in his eyes, Liz felt every second of the pain he'd gone through ... and the intensity of the love he felt for her friend and her niece. The words wouldn't come, unable to slide past the tightness in her throat. In reply, she just nodded, tears running down her own cheeks.

  "Oh, God.” He dropped onto the sofa, mumbling to himself. “Oh, God. No..."

  "I'm sorry, Jake.” Moving to sit beside him, she placed her arm around his trembling shoulders.

  "Chloe's m-mine?"

  The words were nothing more than an incredulous whisper. If Liz hadn't been sitting so close she wouldn't have heard them.

  "Yes, Jake. You're her father."

  He was looking at Liz, but he wasn't seeing her. In his mind he was locked into that stormy night, five years ago, the night he fell in love with Cassie, even though he was too drunk and too stupid to realise it at the time.

  "There could only be one time ... That first night ... she took me home.” Now that the realisation had settled in, so, too, the questions. “But why didn't she tell me? Why, Liz? I would've married her. I would never have let her do it all on her own."

  Liz took a deep breath. How much should she tell? It was a quick decision. One look at Jake's face was enough to settle it in her mind. “She came over to the house as soon as she found out she was pregnant. She was going to tell you, Jake."

  "So why didn't she? I've missed all these years of my little girl's life. I should have been there, dammit!” The pain-driven anger flared briefly before subsiding, sputtering into a distraught moan. “I would have given anything to be..."

  She rubbed his arm, trying to comfort him. “I know, Jake. I believe you. But do you remember the day that you and Sandy announced your engagement? Cass came over that day..."

  "Oh, Jesus."

  "Yeah. That was the day. Understandably, the timing sucked."

  "But if she'd told me, I would have helped her...” He was desperate, trying to find solutions to a problem that had been taken out of his hands years ago, even without any of them knowing. But when he looked at her, the pain in those glittering blue eyes was almost more than she could bear.

  "I know you would, Jake. I do. But can you imagine what it would have done to your relationship with Sandy? Cass was trying to protect you, the only way she could see. Spare a thought for the shock it must have been to her."

  "I know, Liz. I can understand that. But what about now? She knew I loved Chloe. I didn't want to be Uncle Jake, dammit. I wanted more ... so much more..."

  "Part of that is my fault, Jake."

  "What do you mean?"

  "She wanted to know why you and Sandy broke up. I-I told her."

  "Oh, no,” he groaned. Suddenly, things all started to make sense. “So, she thought I didn't want kids of my own?"

  "Yes. And anyway, how do you tell the man you've loved for years that the child he loves so much is his? She felt guilty too, because of all the time you've missed with Chloe. The closer you got, the harder it became to tell you. She was so scared of losing you. She tried a few times, though. The time never seemed to be right."

  "How long have you known, Sis? I'm your brother, for chrissakes. I had a right..."

  "Hold on a second. I didn't know, either, not until the night before the wedding. And that was only because I forced it out of her.” She could see the pain and hurt etched on Jake's face. “Don't judge her, okay? It hasn't been easy for her, Jake. Raising Chloe on her own, and doing a damn fine job, I might add. She made the choices she had to as she saw them. I'm not sure I would have done it any different. In fact, I'm not sure I could have done it so well."

  "It doesn't matter, anyway.” His body slumped back against the sofa, the aura of defeat hovering over him. “She's got Richard now..."

  "Yeah, Richard...” She dropped her head, trying to think of the best way to tell him. She nodded to herself, decided. Cass would likely never speak to her again, but that was the chance she would take; she'd come too far to turn back now. “Do you remember when I first met Cass in high school, Jake?"

  "Of course I do. She used to sleep over at our house all the time. You two were like sisters. The two of you tailing me all the time nearly drove me nuts."

  "Hey, you loved it. And you did your share of trailing us, don't forget."

  "Just making sure you didn't get into trouble..."

  Liz swallowed a small smile, knowing she had one more thing to tell Jake and then she was done. After that, it would be up to him. “She's been in love with you ever since then, Jake. Never been anybody else in all the time I've known her. That's a long time to love somebody."

  "But what about the other guys she's been out with?"

  "What other guys?” she asked, leaving the question hanging deliberately.

  Chapter Eighteen

  There was just one more thing he had to do.

  Richard.

  He noticed another car in the driveway as he pulled up, and it looked vaguely familiar. Normally, he would have called first, but he had a feeling that Richard would have hung up on him. And who could have blamed him? He could hear voices inside as he approached the house. He didn't want to interrupt, but what he had to say wouldn't take long, anyway ... He rapped on the door and waited.

  A dishevelled Richard opened the door looking like he'd just got out of bed. Barefoot, wearing nothing but a pair of old sweats, hair mussed.

  "Jake.” Richard observed him quietly. “I wondered when you'd come by. Come in. There's somebody I'd like you to meet."

  Jake walked in and stopped abruptly, surprised. Hell, it was more than surprise, it was...

  "Cindy!"

  "Hi, Jake."

  "What are you doing here, Cin?"

  Cindy was blushing, but she smiled shyly at Richard who walked up beside her and put his arm possessively around her waist.

  "I believe you know my lady, Jake."

  Of course he knew her. Cindy was his cousin, sister to the annoying Kate, but without the qualities that drove Jake nuts. Quiet, gentle, a real honey ... “But how did you and she..."

  "Twelve months ago. You sent me over to do the work on her extension, remember?” Richard looked fondly down at Cindy. “We've been dating ever since. We keep it private. No one in the family knows because that's the way she wants it.” He paused to kiss the tip of her nose affectionately. “Too much family interference after her divorce, apparently. In fact, we'd be married now if she hadn't been so burned. But I'm a patient man.” He smiled down at her before turning back to Jake. “That's beside the point, though. We've been doing some talking. You see, I told her what you thought about Cass and me ... I didn't want her hearing it from anybody else in the family and drawing the wrong conclusion. And I'm glad I did. Honesty with your woman really works, you know. You should try it,” he said dryly. “Anyway, it appears Cindy overheard a phone conversation between Kate and another woman one day when she was over there. Cass's name was mentioned. And yours. And mine ... Someone's been playing games with us, mate. You find out who that is, and the rest should make sense ... fall into place."

  Jake knew, and the knowledge settled in his gut like a lump of lead. After Lizzy's visit, he talked with his ma.

  "Sandy.” Jake and Cindy said the name as if it dawned on them together.

  "Sandy? Your ex-wife?” Richard glanced from Cindy to Jake in amazement. “Jesus, mate! And you believed her?"

  "I didn't have any reason not to. We're divorced, Richard. She has nothing to gain by lying to me."

  "She wants you back, Jake. Until Richard told me what happened, none of what I'd overheard really made much sense to me, but now it does."

  "But we're still friends. It was an amicable break up.” He looked at her in disbelief.

  "I don't believe this.” Richard shook his head. “You'd take the word of your ex-wife about something as important as this, over Cass? You really don't deserve her, you know."

  He was right about that.

  "I'
m sorry, Richard. I don't know what to say."

  "I appreciate it, mate, but I'm not the one who needs to hear your apology."

  No. There was someone he needed to do a damn sight more to than apologise.

  * * * *

  He pulled up in the driveway. Cassie was alone, thanks to Liz. His little sister had been understanding when he'd asked her to go and get Chloe, giving Cassie the excuse that she wanted to do some aunt/niece stuff and take her shopping or something. He needed time alone with Cassie. To talk. To apologise. Hell, he'd beg if he had to.

  The importance of this moment was not lost on him. The next few minutes would either be the beginning of a new life for all of them, together, or the end of his. Because there would never be anyone but Cassie for him. He'd known that the moment he'd seen her at the wedding. After gently nurturing their relationship, he had damn near blown it all to hell in a fit of jealous rage.

  He pushed down firmly on that thought. If he started down that mental path, he'd never get out of the goddamned car. With a deep breath, he opened the door and stepped out.

  * * * *

  Tucking a wayward curl behind her ear, Cass looked up at the sound of the doorbell. With a resigned sigh, she swung her legs off the lounge and stood. Would she ever get over this incessant feeling of tiredness? She had hoped for a quiet afternoon when Lizzy came and asked if she could take Chloe off her hands for a few hours. Flicking the power button on the remote, she turned off the TV and padded on bare feet to the front door.

  From the shadowy darkness of the hall, she spotted Jake, standing there with his head down, and her heart stopped beating. For a long moment, all she could do was stare. His face looked strained, and he was slumped against the door frame, but to her eyes he looked like a god. Just the sight of him was enough to take her breath away and drove home to her just how much she had missed him. A part of her had died the day he walked out and he was certainly the last person she expected to see on her doorstep. Not after...

  No, she couldn't do it. The memory of his last visit was something she could try to forget if she didn't have to see him, but not if he was here. She swallowed a small whimper and started to back away from the door before he saw her. Not quickly enough. At the small noise, his head shot up and he looked directly at her, stilling her backward progress.

  "Cassie?” he asked softly. “Can I come in?"

  Come in? Was he crazy? “Why, Jake? I thought you'd already said everything you wanted to say."

  "I was wrong. I'm sorry. Please..."

  She turned to walk away. Losing control in front of Jake was something she would not do. She was about to crack as it was, feeling the tears gathering in her eyes, but the look on his face stopped her. She knew that look. It wasn't the Jake she knew—she would have forced herself to turn away from that. No, this was the same look that greeted her every morning when she looked in the mirror. Devastation. Loss. Hurt and pain. It had become so bad she had stopped looking at herself in the mornings, unable to face what she saw.

  Standing there, he looked much the same ... a little leaner, maybe, but freshly showered and in the familiar jeans and t-shirt that looked so good on him. But this was the veneer, the outer view. Instead, it was his eyes, the sharp blue seeming unnaturally bright that pulled her into his soul, allowing her a glimpse of what he was feeling on the inside. And it was that, more than anything that wrenched at her, pulling her back to face him. It was the mirror of her own. And she found that whatever had been said, whatever had died between them, she couldn't turn away. She loved him. Sadly, she always would.

  With a shrug, she unlocked the catch and held the door open. “Come in, Jake."

  She walked through to the kitchen, unsure where to look or what to do, but knowing he'd follow. “Tea?” she asked, but this time he shook his head.

  It was almost a repeat of that Saturday, how many weeks ago? Like déjà vu, but not quite. This time was different. This time there was no hope.

  * * * *

  How could he have done it? As he looked at her, the pain he had caused her was etched clearly on her face: the dark circles under her eyes, shining with that glassiness that precedes tears; the paleness of her skin; the telltale way she leaned against the cupboard for support against the obvious sag of tiredness ... Knowing now what he did, compliments of Lizzy, he understood how his words and accusations must have torn her apart. What on earth could he say to make up for that? No amount of “I'm sorry” would be enough. But he had to try. If nothing else, for all of them, he had to try.

  "I came to apologise, Cassie."

  He stood and waited and watched her. Wispy tendrils of hair were falling out of the clip and she fingered them nervously. Once he would have smiled down at her and fixed them, using her nearness as an excuse to steal a kiss. Not this time.

  "So apologise and leave, Jake."

  The words were not uttered harshly, nor with venom, but resigned, as if she just wanted him to say his piece and be gone. Okay, that was more than he had thought he would be allowed on the drive over here. But there was a lot more at stake now than just their feelings. He also had his little girl to consider and that especially gave him the courage to do what he knew he must.

  "I was wrong, Cassie. I should never have said the things I said to you.” Never should have believed them or even considered them, he thought.

  "No argument here."

  "No, I know.” What to say now? “I ... err ... went to see Richard."

  "Oh, great! Looking for proof? Firing him wasn't enough?"

  "No, Cassie. It wasn't like that.” He struggled desperately to explain. “I went to apologise to him and attempt to find out who was trying to drive us apart."

  "What are you talking about?"

  "Somebody didn't want us to be together. After I had time to think and cool down, some things started to bother me, so I went to see Richard."

  "Why didn't you just come and ask me for the truth? You never even gave me a chance..."

  That was true. He had taken the word of someone else, not that he didn't trust his ma, but with something as important as this he should have trusted Cass enough to find out the source of his ma's information instead of believing the worst of the woman he professed to love, and killing any chance of them ever being together. But he was stupid and arrogant and a fool.

  "I should have, Cassie. I was just ... I was hurt. I couldn't stand the thought of you with another man. It damn near killed me."

  Her hands fluttered as if dismissing the words. “So, Richard?"

  "Richard. I was amazed he didn't beat the crap out of me and tell me to get lost. I would've in his place. But I met Richard's girlfriend, too.” Cassie's brow lifted at that. “Nice lady,” he said with a weak smile.

  "Yes, I know.” A sad smile crossed her face. “We've met."

  "She's my cousin, Cindy."

  "Yes, I know that, too, Jake. I have since the first time I met her."

  It looked like Cassie knew a whole lot more than he had. Of course that just made him feel like a bigger idiot. “Anyway, she confirmed a few things for me that I had kinda been wondering about."

  "Like?"

  "Did you know that Sandy was behind it ... all of it. The rumours, the lies..."

  "Sandy? Your ex?” Cassie's eyes widened.

  Obviously that was one bit of information he had over her, for all the good it would do him. “Sandy had implied a few times that she wanted us to give it another go."

  "And what did you say, Jake? Did you want to?"

  "Never, darlin'. There was only one woman I wanted.” You, he wanted to say. Only you.

  "So, why then?"

  "It's my fault. I never really took it seriously. I guess she was more determined than I gave her credit for. I thought it would be enough if I just said no. I never suspected, though, how far she would go. And I was too consumed with jealousy about you and Richard to realise."

  "Well, fine, Jake. At least now we know. That's it, then...” She moved to
turn away, but he grabbed her arm, halting her, the warm softness of her skin penetrating his palm.

  "No, Cassie. Don't ... That's not all..."

  "What else is there, Jake? You've said you're sorry. We know who was behind it. It's done."

  "Cassie...” He took her other hand in his, feeling the tenseness running through her. “There's more ... Chloe..."

  A broken sob escaped her and she jerked, trying to break free from his grasp. Her face had drained of what little colour it had. If he gave her half a chance, she was going to bolt, he just knew it.

  "Darlin', hear me out, please...” His hands moved up her arms, holding her firmly, pulling her a step closer. He took a deep breath and stepped out into the void. “I know about Chloe.” He tried to say it as gently as he could, but his heart was nearly breaking. He couldn't blow it. Not now. Not this time. There was too much at stake.

  "H-how?” she eventually got out, but he could feel her trembling.

  "In a minute.” He pulled her into his arms before she fainted on him. “In a minute, darlin', I promise. Just ... I've got to hold you for just a minute.” His breath caught as his arms wrapped around her. With a silent groan, he inhaled the familiar lavender scent.

  He would not lose this! Whatever it took, he would hold her like this for the rest of their lives if he had to.

  Triggered by the feel of her in his arms, the smell of her that he loved, the exquisite sigh of her breath against his chest, and suddenly, the words were tumbling out...

  "I love you, Cassie. Since the second I touched you at the wedding ... no, since that first night I made love to you ... I feel like I've always known in some part of me, that I was meant to be with you. It's why ... it's the reason I could never fully commit to Sandy."

  She stiffened in his arms. “But Lizzy said..."

  "I know. That I didn't want kids?” He felt her answering nod, fighting the sudden shaft of need for her as her lips scraped across the bare patch of skin on his neck. “She told me. But she was wrong, darlin'. So wrong. I just didn't want them with Sandy, or any other woman for that matter. Only you..."